Exploring Identity: Hekatean, Hellenic, or something else? Part Two

Turns out I had a Lot to Say™ so this ended up needing two parts. In Part One, I got into the “something else” rather than explain why I don’t often self-identify as a Hekatean or Hellenic, despite occasionally and partially using both. Somewhat backwards of me but I hope you won’t mind terribly.

As I explained in Part One, Hekate is the central deity of my practice and overall Triskelion system. Understandably, one might ask “how are you not a Hekatean then?”. The answer is, well, I am! I do consider myself a Hekatean practitioner (devotee, witch etc) but I don’t often use it as an identifier unless I’m referring to the Hekatean community in general. The main reason for that being that despite Hekate’s monumental significance in my practice, She is far from the only important deity or influence. Limiting myself to identifying mainly as Hekatean would be a disservice to the other Gods and Spirits I follow and who are dear and important to me.

This reason also applies to my avoidance of “Hellenic” as a self-identifier although in this case, there are other reasons as well. To begin with, I have to say, being ethnically Greek means I am Hellenic anyway. “Hellenic” is an ethnonymic adjective for my people, our land, our culture and all we create (the Hellenic language, for example). We call ourselves “Hellenes”, not Greeks (though the latter exists in our language today as well as in antiquity: “Γραικοί”). We call the Gods my ancestors worshiped and named Hellenic or Greek: they are “of the Hellenes/Greeks”. Furthermore, I do worship and honor Hellenic Gods as well as study and utilize Hellenic sources for religious and magical practices (though not necessarily as a Reconstructionist would).

Technically speaking, I am a Hellenic polytheist. I don’t usually call myself that though. A big reason is my personal disdain with the local and international Hellenic communities and the tendency to equate Hellenic polytheism as a whole with Reconstructionism (which is a methodological approach, not a religion or religious practice in itself). In other words, I avoid self-identifying directly as Hellenic polytheist because I do not want to be associated with the related communities in general (that said, I know plenty of individuals who are excellent people and practitioners and do wonderful work to heal the Hellenic polytheistic communities – sadly moreso internationally than in Greece). The general disapproval of magic and mysticism in the Hellenic communities is another factor, given the importance of magic and mysticism in my own practice.

I have chosen a unique label for my religious identity (Triskelion Witch) and prefer to use more neutral labels when interacting with less in-the-know people, such as “polytheistic witch” or “religious witch” plus a brief mention of my devotional relationships, i.e. “devotee of Hekate, the Wildwood Court, and the Witchfather”. Even then, despite the rather common label of “Witch”, I still use another word to precede and clarify it. The complexity and multi-aspected nature of my praxis require a suitably unique and specific label. Fun fact, before it evolved to its current incarnation, I used to call the early form of the Triskelion system “NeoHellenic Witchcraft”. However, the growing importance of the Wildwood and the eventual arrival of the Witchfather made me reconsider the place of “Hellenic” in the main name for the practice.

Names are powerful. As a theologian and practitioner of magic, names are power to me. To name something properly, to know its true name, is to hold power over it. Taken a bit further into the mystical, to name something properly, to know its true name, is to truly know that thing. Properly naming yourself, your practice, your work means truly knowing these things. Dare to name yourselves.

Exploring Identity: Hekatean, Hellenic, or something else? Part One

This blog post is one among a handful that had been works-in-progress for a while and it was completed thanks to the support of my patrons over at my Patreon! I'm posting these articles as early access content there first and two weeks later they will be posted here. This is the first one out of the batch, with Part Two coming out tomorrow!

Let me start by saying that the title is a little clickbaity. I don’t talk about those particular labels specifically, but I used them because they are well-known and understandable. Tackling them would make this too long and I wanted to address some less explored labels, especially those that generate a level of “discourse” and reaction, such as “witch” and “religious”.


Identity is a complex and highly personal topic. Even so, we look to how others define and identify themselves for guidance and inspiration in figuring out our own identities. In addition, as a theologian I think it’s important to share definitions of terms, our identities and our religious labels. In my opinion, I believe doing so helps create clearer common vocabulary as well as increase the pool of accessible information for all fellow co-religionists and practitioners.


My identity has many layers and aspects, not all of which are immediately understood or recognizable by everyone. Let’s start from the way I self-identify “officially”: a Triskelion Witch.


Immediately, we see a label a lot of people recognize but few would agree on how to define: witch. The way I understand and define “witch” and, therefore, the way and reason why I call myself one is thus: a practitioner of magic, especially “low magic” and folk magic though not limited to that, who holds powerful relationships and alliances with spirits and entities, and who has a varied liturgical structure that can range from very casual to fairly ritualistic. Going with this definition, we can safely say that not everything I do and practice is witchcraft. Yet, I choose to call myself a witch anyway. Why?




Before I tackle that question, let’s explain the Triskelion part. A triskelion or triskele (from Greek “τρισκελής” meaning “three-legged”) is a triple spiral or three-pronged symbol that is commonly associated with Celtic cultures and motifs but which was present throughout the Old World (ancient Greece included). My choice of this symbol and its name as the label for my magical-religious system of practice is in reference to the tripartite nature of my system itself: it is comprised of the Hekatean Craft, the Wildwood Art, and the Witchfather’s Way; three distinct practices that overlap at points and are grounded on the common culmination of my experiences, divine & spirit relationships, and my journey thus far. You can read more about this elsewhere on this blog though keep in mind I ought to post a more current and accurate overview and explanation.


From this we can define a Triskelion Witch as a witch who practices the Triskelion system. But many people might not be familiar with my personal system or might not even know what a triskelion is at all. Knowing this, I often describe myself as a “polytheist witch” or “religious witch” in addition to listing my main devotional relationships. These tend to be more recognizable to the wider community and thus people understand more clearly what I am. But it doesn’t stop there. I also label myself “mystic” and “devotional polytheist”, for example. To explain these, allow me to give you a brief summary of the Gods and Spirits I serve and how my relationships with them affect my identity.


My primary deity is Hekate. I’ve been devoted to Her since 2010 although I spent a full year before that studying everything about Her and forging the relationship-to-be. Pretty much everything I do or build is centered on Hekate or related to Her in some capacity. At Her request and under Her guidance, I started making what I came to call the “Hekatean Craft” I mentioned earlier. This became the basis of today’s Triskelion. Through my spiritual explorations of the Otherworld (or, more accurately, the Triple World), I was led by Hekate to interact with a group of spirits and divinities in a realm I call the Wildwood. These are the Wildwood Court. I don’t have a specific devotional date for them because our relationships have been less clear-cut than with Hekate, and they took much longer to take more concrete forms. I would say I started recognizing them in more-or-less the ways I do now around 2012-2013. Finally on 2016, through Hekate and the Wildwood Court, I attracted the attention of the being I call the Witchfather, who is the infamous “Devil of the Craft” as he is known in the traditional witchcraft community. My relationship with him is, perhaps disagreeably so for others, not particularly steeped in Christian imagery, and is of a primarily Dionysian, ecstatic approach. Perhaps this a way he would appear in a pre-Christian setting before gaining the devil associations (which still exist in my own relationship with him, mainly because I used to be Christian and thus affected by such imagery on the necessary levels for the kind of work the Witchfather engenders).


Now do you see why I call myself a Witch? There is an undeniably current of witchcraft and “witch-type magic” in my overall practice, even if it’s not alone. Still, it is central and fundamental, therefore it is a core aspect of my identity and its labels.


These Gods and Spirits and the relationships and pacts I have with them also explain why I would call myself “religious”, “mystic”, and “devotional polytheist”. My service to them is transformative, spiritually transmutative, socio-culturally transgressive and non-conforming, self-affirming and life-affirming, self-empowering, spiritually dedicated, molded through worship, devotion, and divine ecstasy. The experience of the Mysteries, devotional practice, and incredibly varied magic are vitally significant for me.


It is by examining my own practice and path that I arrived at the labels I use. I looked to what I was doing, what I believed in, how I interacted with my Gods and Spirits and what they govern and impart to me in order to be able to properly define myself in religious terms. I am “blank” because I do “so and so”, practice “this and that”, and believe “these things”. Personally, I am of the strong opinion that you create something first and then name it, especially when it comes to our religions. I believe so because our religious practices as well as ourselves change and evolve so much that they are almost never what we expect when we begin. When I started on this multi-aspected path, I thought I was a Hellenic Reconstructionist. The polytheistic part and the Hellenic part remained (and not just because I’m Greek) but everything else changed irrevocably. At some point early on, I also thought I would be an Eclectic “Wiccan” or some version of that. Yet my witchcraft journey made me something quite different (fond as I may be of traditional Wicca – the influence and lessons I treasure from initiates stay with me to this very day).


Identity is deeply personal. At the same time though, we must remain cognizant of the way our wider community utilizes and treats various names, labels, and terms. Sometimes this means following along. Other times, it means fighting against preconceptions and ignorance. In many cases, it may even mean we have to forge an altogether new name or term or label and make that known. I’ve certainly done all three in varying degrees. It is easy to use an identifier out of a need to belong. It is also easy to reject a label out of a need for rebellion. Both are rooted in important feelings and matters but they need to be examined carefully; they are also a highly personal subject that no one, save perhaps for one’s therapist, can truly help you solve.


That is why I recommend a well-rounded approach. Like I said earlier, look first at what you do. Then look to your Gods and spirits (if any, though if you’re reading my writings, you probably believe in and interact with Gods and spirits in some way). How do these affect you? How do they shape who you are? What would something like that be called? Following that, look to the various communities. How do they identify one another? How do individuals label themselves and others? Where and what causes conflict and reaction, and why? Then take all conclusions, thoughts, and further questions these raised, and try to mold them into something. What shape does it take? Perhaps no current name you’re aware of exists that fully applies to you. Or maybe many different ones do but they can’t be easily combined. Or maybe you are right at home with “stereotypical” or mainstream labels. All that is fine. What matters is that when you identify yourself, to others, in your work, to your Gods and spirits, to your mirror, you feel yourself.

Revealed Gnosis in the Triskelion System

 Revealed gnosis or transmitted gnosis as I've seen it called by various practitioners, is knowledge one receives from their Gods and/or Spirits. This gnosis is usually not some temporary message or generic advice from our Gods. It's information and knowledge transmitted for specific purposes. It is often esoteric in nature and helps guide the practitioner towards a fuller experience and understanding of the Mysteries. In many cases it can also have valuable practical uses. While not always as clearly communicated as we might hope, Gods and Spirits have the capacity to teach us techniques, incantations and spells, rituals and invocations, secret names and words of power, and even entire systems of practice over time.

 

Divination can facilitate
the imparting of knowledge
from Gods and Spirits

This type of knowledge, the gnosis revealed to us by the Gods and Spirits, is an extremely important part of the Triskelion's nature and identity. My system would not exist without such gnosis because a large part of it has been and continues to be revealed to me through communication with my Gods and Spirits. I do not claim to be some kind of prophet or oracle. It's simply that in order to fulfill duties, goals, and plans, the divinities I worship and work with have deemed necessary to teach me all sorts of things. This doesn't mean that the entirety of my personal practice is revealed gnosis - not by a longshot. Neither are the things I have been taught some kind of unique, never-seen-before super-tradition. Let me make things clearer with concrete examples.

In the Hekatean part of the Triskelion, there are a number of tools I employ for my rituals and various practices. These aren't necessarily completely newfangled tools; what is "new" and "Triskelian" - in other words, what was revealed to me - are the specific uses, properties, names, and methods of creating and utilizing these tools. For instance, the Dagger is nothing new: most magical systems have some kind of magical knife (or more!). What was revealed gnosis was the way to consecrate it, its specific uses and purpose within the Triskelion system, how it is connected with Hekate etc. Other types of revealed gnosis were the existence and names of specific spirits, the way to approach them as well as rituals and spells with Triskelion-specific purposes.

Revealed gnosis is a fundamental part of the Triskelion because most of it wouldn't exist without this gnosis. Almost everything ends up tying together with previous bits and pieces of gnosis and over time has allowed me to give shape and form to the magical tapestry that is the Triskelion system. There's also quite a few "gaps" in the system because I either haven't received the associated knowledge yet or I haven't applied all of what I've been taught (and in some cases, both). This is also a disadvantage of my personal practice and its reliance on revealed gnosis: Gods and Spirits don't operate on human time or terms. I've received gnosis that didn't make sense or have an applicable role until years down the line, when I reached certain points in my practice that related to it. Other times, I didn't catch all the information (the unclear communication I mentioned earlier) and couldn't proceed with what I had. Still, I find that this systemic model suits both me and the Triskelion as a practice due to the extensive presence and utilization of ecstatic rites, trance-work, and spirit-work.

How do I receive this kind of gnosis though? Honestly, in many ways. Usually it happens when I am in a trance state, either in full ritual or during more casual spiritual and magical exercises. Somewhat more uncommon ways are direct instructions through oracles, divination, or unprovoked "spirit dialogue"*. I've also received quite a bit of gnosis through omens, signs, dreams, and similar synchronicities, although this has been the most random and least detailed way to receive gnosis. My preferred method is to engage in "spirit dialogue" during communion rituals and similar ecstatic rites and thus open myself up enough to receive any knowledge my Gods and Spirits might want to impart. It is my preference because it's a more "controlled" and familiar method which affords me the capacity to both acquire a lot of information and retain almost all of it.

After all these years, I tend to always keep one eye (and ear!) open, so to speak, so I won't be caught off-guard and miss or forget any important information. Sadly, I'm not perfect so I do miss "cues" at times, especially if the imparting of gnosis occurs through dreams or the trance-like state before we fall asleep. Like I mentioned earlier, Gods and Spirits don't operate on human terms and time so Their timing and approach can sometimes be inconvenient. Still, I consider myself lucky and blessed to have received and continue to receive so much knowledge from my Gods and Spirits. I am extremely thankful and happy to see my path unfold in such a manner. That said, I do wish things could be a little clearer at times!

* "Spirit dialogue" is what I call ecstatic, direct communication with a God or Spirit. In simple terms, it's literally talking with an entity! For me, their side of the "conversation" tends to manifest as foreign thoughts (seemingly random thoughts that I didn't consciously form myself - they often mentally "sound" different and contain information I couldn't know and didn't have the time to imagine), feelings and impressions, visions and/or manifestations in pathworkings, etc. Physical auditory and visual responses are very rare for me in general so I don't generally experience them in "spirit dialogue" either.

I'm Still Alive!

Wow. More than TWO years since the last time I posted. Since this blog's beginnings back in 2010, there has never been this long a period of inactivity from me. I won't make excuses or jokes this time since it seems I only repeat myself every year! That said, I will give an update of my life and path for the past two years for anyone (still?) reading.

In the last real post, two years ago, I listed the various reasons and happenings in my life between 2016 and 2017 that kept me busy. There have been plenty of major changes since then and most are directly related to the things I was taking about in that post.

Here's what's new with me. First, the bad things:

• I got a job at a warehouse towards the end of 2017 till the middle of 2018. While the company I worked for wasn't completely horrible, the conditions of the job itself were literally backbreaking. I was working overtime constantly, ended up in relentless pain that permanently injured by left thumb and worsened the state of both wrists, and the pay was, while the legal minimum, truly measly. All aspects of my life - mental health, social life, spirituality, art - took a huge hit. 

• Unable to endure the warehouse job, I managed to land a retail job in mid-2018. While seemingly better at first, especially in terms of time (less hours which meant marginally less money but way less physically crippling), it turned out to be even worse as the boss was an atrocious creature (I have trouble calling her a person) whose unpredictable, insulting, and demanding behavior left me in a constant state of extreme anxiety and exhaustion. For those unfamiliar, I suffer from chronic generalized anxiety and depression and I've fought for years to return to a more healthy state of mind and life. Those two day jobs, especially the retail one, took me many steps backwards in terms of mental health progress. 

• In the end, at the beginning of March 2019, I was fired after demanding to be paid the money my boss owed me. That, coupled with four months of stressful, and ultimately futile, efforts to get my money as well as solve a number of other major issues, nearly destroyed my religious and magical practice, reducing it to a mere shadow of a spirituality. I'm still dealing with the psychological (and financial!) aftermath of this past year and a half of bullshit, unfortunately.

•  The Hekatean group I was in that operated under the auspices of the Covenant of Hekate ended up disbanding due to inactivity and the departure of core members. I still maintain a good friendship with the couple that started it and we occasionally do rituals or magic together but we're no longer a formal group of any kind.

•  During 2018, I was also undergoing training for eventual initiation in the Aurum Solis. Unable to cope with yet another source of pressure and being truly drained of time and energy, I ended up stopping the training. While mulling that over, I realized I was seeking initiation for the wrong reasons and the personal revelations that realization ignited changed my thinking and approach on many things in my life, especially in spiritual matters.
   
• The Stardust Compass apparently went inactive some time during my disconnect from my practices. As such, I have completely let go of that particular system.

Now, onto the more positive stuff:

• My boyfriend and I moved together in mid-2018 and have been living together since then. It has been amazing but also very challenging, especially since it's the first time for both of us. Building and maintaining your own, truly independent household is both incredibly rewarding and stupidly difficult!

•  I continue to have a magical relationship with my best friend, although mundane life has caused it to wax and wane in activity.
  
• My relationship with the Witchfather has grown exponentially since the last time I posted here. The development of the Triskelion Path as a whole has also reached new levels and Hekate has elevated me to new strata of understanding I was not expecting. There will be much to do and share regarding the Triskelion in the near future.
  
• Finally, my art and writing have grown a lot, both in terms of quality as well as in terms of productivity. My goal is for 2020 to be a year of publications and full-fledged work in those matters.

So, that's the cliffnotes version of the past two years of my life! I will jinx this again and say I'm hoping to post more in the coming months. I've been inspired recently so I'm revitalizing my online presence in regards to religious/magical matters, such as making a Pagan/occult-focused Instagram account. I found that doing so helped keep me productive and accountable with my artistic goals so I'm hoping it will do the same for my religious and magical stuff. Here's to more content!

P.S. I've also changed my online name to Chelydoreus. It's my public "magical name" and, in an effort to shift my mindset to a more professional approach, I've decided to also make it my screen name.

Coming and Going Or Why I Can't Post Regularly To Save My Life

An entire year of inactivity on this blog after promises of regular updates and upcoming projects. And, out of the blue, I post an Aretalogy of Hekate as if no "dead period" had passed.

Rightfully, my readers, you would ask "what the eff?".

Honestly? I've been tremendously busy and, for once, it wasn't so much with mundane matters but predominantly with spiritual ones. The Three Days of Hekate from last year initiated (hah!) a veritable avalance of progress, duties, spiritual and magical work, and synchronicities without end.

Here's a brief description of my year between the Three Days and today just to show how engrossed I've been in my practices and path, in no particular order:

• After the Three Days of Hekate in late May 2016, I participated in a three-day Hellenic festival called the Prometheia in early/mid-July 2016. It was an indescribable experience and while I did write up a modest recounting of my experiences there, I haven't posted it since I feel it just doesn't do it justice. To give you an oversimplified idea of the whole thing: 3 days of free camping on Mount Olympus under Zeus' blessed oaks surrounded 24/7 by (mostly) like-minded individuals and all sorts of rituals, celebrations and other happenings. I was truly plunged in what could very well have been the daily lives of my Hellenic ancestors. Incense filled the air at all times, hymns could be heard at any given moment, I stood besides my co-religionists in ritual and I experienced the virtues of friendship, love (agape), hospitality and the ineffable Mysteries. I was present during naming ceremonies and I participated in private, deeply moving conversations with dear friends. I even ended up participating in an impromptu oracular ritual involving Hekate for the first time in my life and it utterly shattered any doubts or skepticism I had regarding oracles. I can only describe the whole thing as a truly magical experience. I sadly can't attend this year but, given how it's been going strong for over 2 decades (last year was the 21st festival!), I am certain I will get to experience it again in the future.

• My work with the Amaimaketon Vasileian Sanctuary of the Covenant of Hekate and the private magical/devotional group of Hekateans bloomed and culminated into official membership in the Covenant (after years of failed applications due to technical issues) during this year's celebration of Her Sacred Fires.
  
• I recently formed a powerful working relationship with my best friend after strong urging from our patron deities. This is the one thing I can't really talk about besides this short mention due to its very private nature. Nevertheless, it is one of the most demanding projects I have on my plate right now. 
  
• During ecstatic work with the Wildwood Art, I was approached by a figure that identified itself as the Black Goat of Mysteries, the Witchfather, the Man in Black, and the Devil of the Craft. Of all things that have happened to me over this past year, His appearance, call, and our work have been the most unexpected and unpredictable. In our considerably few interactions compared to beings I've worked with or worshipped for years (like Hekate), the Witchfather has been almost terrifyingly and tangibly real and manifested. His is a path I neither expected nor devised nor intended and though He came along with the Wildwood AND under the auspices of Hekate, He fits in neither NeoHellenic Witchcraft nor the Wildwood Art. Perhaps He is the "missing" leg of the Triskelion after all. My work with him so far has been... illuminating, to say the least.
  
• My work with the Stardust Compass has taken an unfortunate backseat, so to speak, during all this. It's still there, it still calls to me and itches my soul for involvement but I am stretched towards too many and too demanding directions. I have promised myself to return to it come Autumn because it sings a song to my spirit that fills gaps, however small or hidden, that nothing else does.
  
• I have been advised, both by Gods and fellow devotees/practitioners, to pursue training and participation in the Ordo Aurum Solis, something I had been mulling over for a few years now. While financial and spiritual reasons haven't allowed me to tackle it just yet, it is something I will definitely move towards and attempt as soon as possible.
  
• From a mundane perspective, I've been working on my comics and writing as well as devoting a lot of time to my relationship with my boyfriend (practically fiance). Living with family, good, supportive, loving family is not a bad thing but at the age of 26 at the time of writing of this piece, it is a bit too much. So, I'm working as hard as I can to gain my much desired and needed independence which will remove a lot of limitations on my life, especially on the spiritual/religious/magical part.
  

That's just the cliff-notes version of the past year. When I performed those transformative rituals during the Three Days, I knew they'd open up the way for a lot of new and challenging things. I just didn't think it would turn out to be this busy! Now, none of this is truly an excuse or justification for not posting on here. If anything, it reinforces my view that I'm a sloppy procrastinator when it comes to blogging. Still, I think I owed you, my readers, an explanation and an update of sorts for my absence. Let's hope I can keep some semblance of activity on here from now on!

Aretalogy of Hekate

I am HEKATE.

I am She of the Many Names.

I am Hekate of the Crossroads.

I am the Torchbearing Mistress of the Night.

I am the Keybearer of the Ineffable Mysteries.

I am Hekate of Heaven, Earth, and Sea.

I am at all places and none at once.

I am the Crossroads and its Liminal Heart.

I am the World Soul and from Me the River of Mysteries springs forth.

I am Triple Hekate, Friend of Kore, She who consoles Demeter and soothes the pain of loss.

I am the Kourotrophos, namelessly honoured by mothers with their cries during labour.

I am the Psychopomp for the Lost.

I am the Queen of the Dead and of the Infernal Realms.

I am She who treads Olympus and Hades alike.

I am Hekate, Unconquerable Queen, Daughter of my Father and heiress to His might.

I am Hekate, Veiled with the Starry Night-sky and Bringer of Oracles, Daughter of my Mother and heiress to Her gift.

I am the Initiatrix and the Creatrix and the Mother of All Souls.

I am the Cauldron of the Witch and the Wisdom of the Cunning Man and the fearful prayer upon the lips of the wary traveler.

I am She who provides to the poor and the wealthy alike.

I am Hekate, Many-named, Many-formed, equally honoured by mortals and immortals for eternity.

I am She who births the Witchblood.

I am She who grants the First Flame to the soul of man.

I am Hekate of the Obscure, Hekate of the Renowned, Hekate of the Mighty, Hekate of the Hidden.

I am the Goddess of Liminality and I am found on every threshold.

I am the one that brings all together at the roots of the World Tree which I feed with my own essence.

I am the Witch Queen, terrible in my splendor, mighty in my Craft, teacher of the gifted and the restless.

I am the Mother of Theurgy, who taught humanity how to become like Us.

I am the Mediator of the Mortal and Immortal Realms, for prayers can be heard and answers received in accordance to my Will.

I am Hekate, thrice-adored, thrice-worshipped, thrice-honoured.

I am She of the Darkest Night and the Brightest Day, She of Dawn and Dusk and of the changing Moon.

I am She who holds the universe in Her palm yet sees every single candle flame.

I am the Flame and the Shadow and the Soul Crystalline in the Heart of the World and in the souls of all living things.

I am the Lurker in the Cave, the Keeper of Secrets, and the Wielder of all True Names.

I am the Primary Initiatrix and all Mysteries flow from me.

I am HEKATE.

The Journey So Far

In lieu of recently celebrating the anniversary of my first, “official” Pagan ritual and the beginning of this life-long journey, I decided to write a post exploring my experiences and major milestones in my spiritual and religious evolution. I thought it necessary, lest I forget as I grow older: always remember your past so that you know what brought you where you are now, what the future might hold, and what mistakes you should avoid repeating.

I was always an odd kid, introverted and buried in books of fiction and fantasy. As far back as I can recall I was always enamoured with magic. This found an outlet beyond that of fantasy when I discovered a book in my grandfather’s library (a man of many talents and even more interests): Egyptian Magic, by E.A. Wallis Budge. The contents of this book utterly fascinated my 11-year-old self.

A bit of background info: I grew up in a decidedly Orthodox Christian country, where the only “choices” are Christianity or Atheism and where everything else is treated as either fairytales or something foreign and absurd. My family, with the exception of my maternal grandmother, are not religious (my mother and sister being, in fact, atheists) and I enjoyed as secular an upbringing as possible for a Greek. However, I was still exposed to the worldviews of Orthodox Christianity and (mild) Western secularisation, with all that entails. As such, and this being a time before the internet was widespread and easily accessible in Greece, I was ignorant of other religions, especially Pagan ones.

That book on Egyptian magic opened an entirely new world for me. Before I knew it, I found myself offering figs and water to Gods like Dhejuti (Thoth) and Bast, concocting “potions” with surprising results (such as making a “poultice” of sorts with mud and certain plants and grass that exterminated ant nests better than my grandfather’s chemicals), and weaving small spells inspired by that book which worked far better than I hoped or imagined.

This fascination persisted. When I turned 13, I was given a PC as a birthday present, along with an internet connection (I’m talking old dial-up internet, the kind that resulted in conversations like “Get off the phone, I want to check something on the internet!”). I immersed myself in the endless treasure trove of information that is the World Wide Web. I had already read the Da Vinci Code, which sparked my curiousity and fueled my doubts and skepticism towards Christianity. Soon, I decided to research the religion of the ancient Greeks, since we were never taught much beyond mythology at school. What I found enthralled me. I came across a Hellenic polytheist group, YSEE («Ύπατο Συμβούλιο Ελλήνων Εθνικών)», “Supreme Council of Ethnikoi Hellenes”), and studied practically everything available on their website. In the meantime, I found out about forums and Wicca. This new realisation that magic is real was almost too good to be true. I dived into the study of polytheism, witchcraft, and magic and I greedily consumed every bit of info I could find. Thanks to wonderful, knowledgeable people, mostly initiates of various Traditions and practices, I managed to shed my “fluffy-bunny fur” early on.

And thus came 2005 and my 14^th birthday. I had already decided that this was my life’s path. In order to make it “official”, I adapted the name-giving ritual from YSEE’s website and retook my given name (Stefanos) with its original, ancient Greek meaning of “garland” or “crown”. I named myself Pagan, polytheist, and Witch, and I dedicated myself to the study and practice of these things.

Around this time, I e-mailed the head of YSEE. I was deeply disappointed as I was treated rather badly; I was told I was “living miasma” because I dabbled in Witchcraft and magic, and because I am gay. This behaviour, along with the obsessively polemic and anti-Christian bias of YSEE, disgusted me so I abandoned it (I was never officially a member but from that point on, I stopped using their material or referring others to them). I ended up spending a few years in complete solitary practice, save for what semblance of community the internet provided.

Then, during 2009, I was hit by a powerful revelation. Three Goddesses – Hekate, Artemis, and Selene – made their desire for me to follow them and dedicate myself to them known.  I  was surprised and intimidated by this, especially by Hekate, whom I had never honoured or worked with before and for whom I even felt fear from what little I knew about Her. I performed many divinations and even requested help from good friends – and much more experienced practitioners. It was made apparent that I was called to devotional practice. However, I was asked to take some time to explore first. This was a truly God-sent message. After some time filled with study, rituals, and meditations, on October 31^st 2009, Artemis and Selene’s call all but disappeared. What remained, although empowered and crystal-clear, was Hekate. She asked that I prepare myself for a year: study Her, know Her, work with Her, experience Her, live Her, and then decide whether to devote myself to Her. Exactly one year later, on October 31^st 2010, I formally dedicated myself to Hekate.

This initiated (pun intended) huge changes and revelations. From that point on, on many occasions, I have felt the guiding hand of the Goddess and Her weaving of intricate plans. This persists even now and I suspect it will never end. Hekate has been the sole most important and deciding factor in my spiritual and religious life. She has shaped and continues to shape, everything about me.

Under Her wing, I found myself venturing forth to make more contacts, meet new people, and experience new things. I approached an Eclectic Pagan group in Athens, which sadly didn’t prove a fitting match. Through Hekate’s work, I got to know other devotees of Hers, and some years later met some here, in Greece. I also found another Hellenic polytheist group, Labrys, and was pleased to find it a much better community than YSEE.

Still, I strayed from all of that. Years of battling anxiety and depression made everything nigh unbearable. Unable to cope with fellow practitioners and co-religionists and even with my deities and spirits, I ended up abandoning almost everything: my practice, my writing, my dreams. The only thing that remained was Hekate’s aid: occasionally, I would have “good periods” when I attempted to regain what I had lost. This only helped to keep me somewhat “up-to-date” spiritually speaking, but that was enough and even necessary, as I recently realized.

The last year-and-a-half has been refreshingly fruitful, though! Thanks to treatment, I’ve been getting my mental issues in order (or, at the very least, making them manageable again) and this has had the positive effect of my being able to reinvigorate my religious practice. Specifically, since Summer 2015, I’ve been in a frenzy of inspiration, revelations, synchronizations, and improvement. My practice is almost entirely recovered and revamped. New aspects are being revealed to me and obstacles I could not overcome in the past are dissolved with barely any effort. In addition, I ended up reconnecting with a number of old friends and religious acquaintances and this has led to me acquiring a modicum of group practice and experience. There are definitely many things waiting for me in that direction.

As my recent posts will tell you, my overall practice is getting organized, cleared up, and stabilized, so to speak. I keep seeing old connections established again, old experiences and skills resurfacing, old knowledge returning and being relevant and useful again. This last year or so has been a time of true spiritual rebirth for me. I pray and hope it will continue and thrive.

That’s the summary of my journey so far. These past 11 years, I’ve gone from a kid half-playing at honouring Egyptian deities, to a teenager building his first polytheistic and magical practices, to hurdles and disappointments and the growing up that comes with late puberty, to a Hekatean devotee learning his place and role in the world, to a NeoHellenic Witch growing into an independent adult to, finally, the Triskelion practitioner, a Pagan, Polytheist, and Witch blessed to be himself. Here’s to further growth, improvement, development and the blessings of the Gods and Spirits!

Update: Blog Changes

Yes, another update post. Bear with me, this is a little important (if boring) because it deals with the way the blog will be structured and used from now on.

As things are right now, this blog is pretty messy and disorganised. I may not have enough posts here for things to be out of hand yet but I plan on changing that - big time - therefore I need to organise first and save myself future trouble as well as spare my readers from confusion and frustration.

Here's how things change:

Effective immediately (and retroactively!) all posts will be tagged with a particular category (or number of categories, if applicable) specific to their theme. I'll give concrete examples in a bit. First, let's take a look at the categories I have devised. Disclaimer: these are still subject to change so this won't necessarily be their final form (it probably is but I'm warning you just in case).

Reflections from the Mirror: this category will include any post that is "personal": personal experiences, personal opinions, posts related to my (religious) life and so on. Think of it as an online religious journal but tailored for public consumption.

Example: an upcoming post exploring my journey through the strata of Paganism and religion from when I first began and up to the current time (in honour of my 11 year anniversary since my first official ritual and the point when I said "this is who I am now").

Whispers from the Polis: this category will include posts dealing with regional practice and public religion and, specifically, my own approach as expressed through the Athenian Craft of my Triskelion path.

Example: rituals and experiences with local groups, religious work with local deities and spirits and so on.

Wanderings in the Forest: this category will include posts regarding "shamanic" spirit-work and, specifically, my practice and experiences through the Wildwood Druidry of the Triskelion.

Example: acquiring my familiar(s), forging relationships and alliances with spirits of the Wildwood, rituals and other practices "within" the Wildwood and so on.

Hekataia: this category will include posts dealing with magic in general, as well as my practice and exploration of the Hekatean Craft of the Triskelion.

Example: The Hekatean Pathworking, Greek Magic

Hieratika: this category will include posts about polytheistic theology in general, as well as Triskelion theology specifically.

Example: Thoughts on the Hellenic Religion, The Syncretic and Modern Character of the Hellenic Religion Today, Cosmology - The Triple World Model

Akademaika: this category will include posts about scholarly and academic matters as well as my own religious research and articles.

Example: Rebuttal to an Inaccurate Article on Hekate, Definitions, Academic Approach

Miscellaneous: this category will include posts that don't belong to other categories.

Example: blog updates, announcements, placeholder posts etc.

Obviously, various posts might belong to multiple categories and will be tagged in all of them (e.g. something might belong both to the Akademaika as well as the Hieratika).

In the near future, once the chaos (delightful though it is, in its own way) of the Greek Easter holidays dissipates and I have the necessary time, energy, and focus for the task, I'll tag everything appropriately and link them to their respective categories. This list has also been posted in a more abbreviated form on the "About the Blog" page for easier access.

Thank you for reading this and I hope this will make things easier for my readers (and myself!). It's only the first of many improvements and developments though, so stay tuned!